Jeremy Fuller (jeremyful) wrote in uw,
Jeremy Fuller

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Halloween Costumes

Alright, it's halloween time, and it's time for me to lay down the law about halloween costumes on campus. First, it's great that people wear halloween costumes at school, and in an ideal world more people would, especially those who put them on at night for parties or watching TV or whatever.

HOWEVER, I'm very disappointed in those of you who do wear costumes at school. It's obvious that many of you are not putting in the proper thought or effort that goes into a good halloween costume. It not only makes yourself look bad, but it makes me look bad for having to be associated with you, if only by city and school. Following is a critique of some of your costumes:

Kimono: We'll start off by dissecting this costume which is a nice representation of the attitude most of you take towards halloween costumes. Just something that was laying around in the closet. And some sandals. Either accessorize heavily or leave the closet-stuff in the closet.

Rating: D

Random Tough Guy: Some guy wearing a lot of leather, green hair, band patches, and all black. Accessories like a belt made of bullets. Is he a punk rocker? Is he a metalhead? Is he a biker? Who knows. It took me a few seconds to even realize this guy was wearing a costume. Good accessories, but absolutely no design. It's like wearing vampire teeth with a white sheet and a tutu. (<-- My idea for next year)

Rating: C-

Ninja: A nice black ninja getup with hood. I didn't notice the shoes worn but they it's good that they didn't capture my attention. No swords etc., which are unneeded accessories. Very understated, very complete.

Rating: A

Funny pants and/or shirts: Come on people. Are you high? Walking to school with a wacky pink t-shirt, leather pants with flames on the side, or crazy golf pants IS NOT A HALLOWEEN COSTUME. I had a hard time telling if some of these people were wearing halloween costumes, but it's clear that some were. The most popular costume, and by far the worst.

Rating: F

Tuxedo: Please. At least get tails and a top hat. It looks nice, though.

Rating: D+

Crossdressing Drama Students: Two female drama students with short dyed hair and nicely makeup'ed beards, as well as suits. It was very, very well executed but not really in the halloween spirit, and it was pretty obvious they were crazy drama students.

Rating: C+

I hope this gives all of you a taste of how horrible your costumes are. The guy with the $5 black ninja getup beat you all. Are you putting on a costume for a party tonight? Well, chances are your costume sucks, so throw it away and get a white sheet and cut some holes in it. Classics always work. Just make sure there are no stains in it.

Thanks for reading! ;) ;) ;)
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